Fax Jokes

Fax Jokes



Unclear On The Concept

  The Met office is now using fax machines to give local authorities 
early warning of severe weather.  The Hampshire emergency planning 
office said: "Rather than having to rely on telephones, for instance, 
where lines are at risk in bad weather, we are encouraging the wider 
use of fax machines." (News courtesy of the Reading Evening Post)




GUIDE TO SAFE FAX

Q:  DO I HAVE TO BE MARRIED TO HAVE SAFE FAX
A:  Although married people fax quite often, there are many single
    people who fax complete strangers every day.

Q:  MY PARENTS SAY THEY NEVER HAD FAX WHEN THEY WERE YOUNG AND WERE
    ONLY ALLOWED TO WRITE MEMOS TO EACH OTHER UNTIL THEY WERE
    TWENTY-ONE. HOW OLD DO YOU THINK SOMEONE SHOULD BE BEFORE THEY
    CAN FAX?
A:  Faxing can be performed at any age, once you learn the correct
    procedure.

Q:  IF I FAX SOMETHING TO MYSELF, WILL I GO BLIND?
A:  Certainly not, as far as we can see.

Q:  IS THERE A PLACE ON OUR STREET WHERE YOU CAN GO AND PAY FOR FAX?
    IS THIS LEGAL?
A:  Yes, many people have no other outlet for their fax drives and
    must pay a "professional" when their needs to fax become too
    great.

Q:  SHOULD A COVER ALWAYS BE USED FOR FAXING?
A:  Unless you are really sure of the one you're faxing, a cover
    sheet should be used to insure safe fax.

Q:  WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I INCORRECTLY DO THE PROCEDURE AND FAX
    PREMATURELY?
A:  Don't panic. Many people prematurely fax when they haven't faxed
    in a long time. Just start over, most people won't mind you
    trying again.

Q:  I HAVE A PERSONAL AND BUSINESS FAX. CAN TRANSMISSIONS BECOME
    MIXED UP?
A:  Being bi-faxual can be confusing, but as long as you use a cover
    with each one, you won't transmit anything you're not supposed to.




  Four major executives from various countries are playing golf
together on the second tee when they hear a phone ring.  The 
Canadian executive reaches into his bag and pulls out a cellular 
phone.
  "OK buy 1000 Microsoft shares", the Canadian tells the other 
person on the phone, then hangs up.  He then says to the others, 
"I'm such an important person that I have to make sure my employees 
can reach me at any time. Therefore I carry a cell phone everywhere."
  On the next tee, they hear another phone.  All of a sudden the
American puts his finger to his mouth and his thumb to his ear and
begins talking.  When he gets off the line he tells the others "I'm 
so important that I had my company install a microphone in my index
finger and a speaker in my thumb.  That way, I don't have to worry
about carrying a cellular telephone."
  The people are impressed and move on. 
  On the green, they hear another phone ring.  The German guy stands
up tall and says "OK sell the company now."  He loosens up and tells
the others "I'm so important that I had my company put a microphone 
in my lip and a speaker in my ear.  That way all I need to do is 
stand up stand up straight to get the signal."
  Everybody is really impressed and they continue playing.
  As the next tee they hear another phone ring.  All of a sudden 
the Japanese executive runs into the bushes.  After a few minutes, 
the others get worried about him so they go into the bushes.  The 
Japanese guy is in the bushes with his pants around his legs and 
squatting as if to take a dump.
  "Oh, we're sorry" the American executive exclaims, "we'll leave
you alone."
  "That's OK," the Japanese executive says "I'm just waiting for a
fax."




View Stats
Yinga.net Free Counters!