Blindness Jokes

Blindness Jokes



How many blind people does it take to change a light bulb?
It depends whether the switch is on or off. 



How can you spot a blind man in a Nudist's Colony?
It's not hard



What goes CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK "Did I get it?"
CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK "Did I get it?"
A blind person playing with Rubik's Cube.



How do blind people know when they are done "wiping?"



  A blind man walks into a department store with his seeing 
eye dog.  He goes wandering up and down the aisles, until he 
gets to a particular aisle.  He stops,  grabs hold of the 
dog's leash very tightly, and then starts whirling the dog 
over his head in a circle. 
  One of the department store clerks sees him and isn't quite 
sure what to do.  So he goes up to the man, hunches over so 
as not to get hit by the whirling dog, and shouts, "Excuse me 
sir, can I help you?"  
  "Nah," said the blind man. "I'm just looking around."



  John is waiting to cross the street when a blind man approaches 
with his guide-dog. The sign lights to cross and instead of helping 
his owner to cross, the dog raises his rear leg an pees on the man's 
pants. The man reaches in his pocket and gives the dog a cookie.
  John is amazed and tells the man, "If it were my dog I would have 
kicked his ass!"
  The man calmly answers, "I'm going to. But I need to find the 
head first."



  Bob, an experienced sky diver, was getting ready for a jump 
one day when he spotted another man outfitted to dive wearing 
dark glasses, carrying a white can and holding a seeing-eye 
dog by a leash.  Shocked that the blind man was also going to 
jump, Bob struck up a conversation, expressing his admiration 
for the man's courage.
  Then, curious, he asked, "How do you know when the ground is 
getting close?"
  "Easy," replied the blind man. "The leash goes slack."



  Johnny had been blind ever since birth.  One day his mother 
comes in and tells him that tomorrow will be a very special day.  
She tells him to bed pray real hard when he goes to bed tonight.  
Johnny goes to bed praying really,  really hard.
  The next day Johnny's mother came into his room and said, 
"Johnny, wake up! Rejoyce!  And see that your prayers have been 
answered!"
  Johnny opens his eyes and screams, "Mommy, mommy I can't see!"
  He mother replies, "I know, April fools Honey!"




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