"Just relax, it won't take long," said the gynaecologist to his nervous patient, "haven't you ever been examined like this before?" "Oh, yeah, but not by a doctor." What does a gynaecologist do when he feels sentimental? He looks up an old girlfriend. This is a visual one... Why do women like old gynaecologists? *raise your hand and point your index finger, while shaking it as if you have Parkinsons Desease.* Why do they call it a pap smear? Because if you called it a cunt scrape nobody would go. What does OB/GYN stand for? Oh Boy, Got You Naked! Definition of gynaecologist: A spreader of old wive's tails. What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynaecologist? A genealogist looks up your family tree and a gynaecologist looks up your family bush. A six year old boy went to school and said to his best friend, "Yesterday, after school, My Mom caught me playing Gynaecologists and nurses with the girl next door." "WOW - I bet YOU were in trouble" said his friend. "Not all, it was Wednesday so we were playing golf!" A woman went to the gynaecologist, who told her she was in perfect health, with the body of an eighteen-year-old. She was so excited she ran home to tell her husband. "Oh yeah?" he said snidely. "What about your big ass?" "He didn't say anything about you." One day, a painter found himself short of help and went to the unemployment office to hire someone for the day. When he arrived, they didn't have any painters available, but they did have a gynecologist there. He reluctantly took him along to help. A couple of weeks later, the painter returned to the unemployment office needing temporary help again. This time there were two painters there, but instead he asked for the gynecologist again. The clerk asked, "Why do you want a gynecologist when we have two professional painters you can take right now?" He said, "Two weeks ago when I hired the gynecologist, we arrived at the house and it was locked with nobody home. But I'll be damned if that gynecologist didn't stick his hand through the mail slot and paint the whole house!!" |
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